What ego has to do with becoming a better leader?
The ego - as it is commonly known - is the aspect of our personality that craves high status, prestige, and always needing to be right. It flourishes when we receive praise and admiration, but it also causes us to avoid situations where our incompetence, unfinished work, or insecurities may be revealed. To become a better leader, it is essential to develop humility and embrace humility as a leader.
Where healthy self-confidence is good, too much listening to the ego can lead us astray. As a leader, you would do well to recognise when your ego is trying to distract you from doing what it wants, forgetting what makes the most sense for the outcome.
By learning how to silence your ego, you will be able to make better decisions – and become a better leader. Here are a few examples:
Admit that you don't know everything
As a manager, you probably know a lot about your industry. Maybe you're used to holding all the strings and making decisions based on your gut feeling. You probably have a broad range of expertise, but you've probably also identified areas where you need help. Hopefully you've also recruited people to your team to support these areas. After all, one of the basic skills of a leader is to understand the limits of your own expertise. A good leader doesn't bask in the limelight with his ego, but dares to hire more competent people to join his team. To make good decisions, you must be unashamed to lean on others in areas that are not your core competence.
Be a fool with new knowledge
It's been studied that good listeners make better decisions. The key to listening is to genuinely understand. It may seem obvious that you should listen and learn to understand, but in practice it's not always easy to do. When we process new information, it is combined with the knowledge we already have, and we automatically make assumptions based on our previous experience. If we listen superficially, assuming we already know what is coming, the risk of misunderstanding is high. Silence your ego and make a fool of yourself with new information. Just when you think you understand, take a step back and listen more carefully. What's really at stake?
Don't fall in love with sheep
As a leader, you may be tempted to surround yourself with people who agree with you and validate your vision and way of thinking. Consensus can also be a strength, but don't let your ego get the better of you in situations where what you really need is diversity and a new way of thinking. After all, the best decisions are the result of multi-dimensional thinking and weighing up different options. Build trust in your organisation so that people have the courage to say what needs to be said, not what you want to hear. Remember that the person who disagrees with you may be the critical link to a critical decision.
Remember that silencing your ego is not weakness or cowardice, but quite the opposite. Uncertainty and incompleteness are part of being human and acknowledging them makes you stronger.
When you learn to listen to your own ego critically, you will also become more confident in being imperfect and human. And that takes balls.
